Daeron Tasatir

My Story

Chapter I - A strange encounter

Fear floods the core of your soul. You feel abandoned, scared and confused. Too many questions rise up in your mind and you can answer none. One of them is pounding obsessively inside your skull louder and louder. "Why am I here? Why am I here? WHY AM I HERE?" you cannot stop asking yourself but the morbid silence around you is the answer each and every time. You start to touch the floor bit by bit with your fingertips. It feels familiar, like wood, but that does not make you feel any safer. You hesitate but finally decide to release yourself from this current state. You take a deep breath and slowly take off your blindfold with both hands, letting it drop to the ground. It seems to be an eternity before your eyes open.

Your eyes are caressed by a gentle light which comes from three lit candles lying in a corner on the floor. Strangely enough you find yourself in a windowless and doorless room. Even stranger is the fact that the room is entirely made out of wood, wood which does not seem to be divided into planks or tiles. The walls, floor and ceiling of this cube-like room appear to be 'carved' in a very large block of wood. "How did I get in here?" you wonder but, before you are able to think of an answer, a strange chill wraps around your spine like a snake. You no longer feel alone and, as you turn, you find a little girl standing behind you. Through her brown curly locks two sparkling green eyes gaze into yours. "Hello!" she says joyfully "Do you want to play a game?"

As you speak, the little girl's joy turns to excitement. She begins to dance with imaginary people and to jump up and down. She takes her time calming down but you do not mind at all. You just stare at her in amazement and smile. You do not feel scared or threatened by her although she appeared from nowhere. You are certain she is a friend and trust her completely. You also hope she can get the both of you out of this Wood Room. You do not take your eyes off her, afraid she might disappear as fast and sudden as she appeared. She is happily playing with the candles now but, after burning her finger on their flame, she leaves the candles alone and joins you. "Do you want to play a game?" she asks again with a very big excited smile.

Her face twitches upon hearing your answer. All her excitement dies in an instant and her eyes begin to grow darker and sadder. Her little mouth starts to shriek and scream while her nails dig into one of the wood walls. She gives you a frightening stare and between the sparks of rage you see a few tears of sadness. "She must've misunderstood me…" you hope. You slowly back away and give her some space. You feel sorry for her but she looks too scary for you to interfere. She soon calms down and no emotions remain visible on her face. Suddenly her eyes find yours and another chill grips your spine. Her eyes look completely lifeless as if belonging to a porcelain doll. "Do you want to play a game?" she asks you, her voice full of rage.

She continues to stare in your eyes. Nothing is happening. Suddenly she starts laughing loudly and happily as her hands clap excitedly and her eyes spark to life. You are amazed to see how one little girl can switch between emotions so quickly but you have already realized that she is no regular little girl. She takes your hands and smiles. Her feet leave the floor and she pulls you up towards the ceiling. A powerful light blinds your eyes. Her voice speaks gently. "My name is Marind. I hope I have all the answers you need but I wish to ask you a favor in return: a long time ago, my life was taken without my will… I was murdered… Please, seek out the name of the one who killed me! You will allow me my eternal rest by doing this. You are my hope…" she lets go of your hands and vanishes.

Chapter II - The Carnaval

Your vision starts to slowly clear, but you feel dazed and confused. It is daylight outside. You can see the bright Sun shining over your face. You find yourself in the middle of a Carnival, crowded with smiling faces that all seem to move in the rhythm of an enchanting music. You look around to your left and to your right, up and down searching for the small Wood Room, but find nothing. However, you see something shine on the grassy floor. As you pick up the item, you realize it was not a Gold Coin as you first thought, but a strange Wood Box. The Box feels familiar to the touch and for a second the idea of you being pulled out of such a small cube passes your mind. It gives you chills and your stomach churns with nausea, as you imagine yourself slowly and painfully getting out of the cube. You faint.

When you open your eyes the Sun is still up. You are lying on the grassy floor, next to the alley you were on. The crowds of the Carnival keep moving on and nobody seems to notice you. You feel rested, but apparently, the Sun has not moved at all from where it was. In your hand you find the weird Wood Box. As you look at the strange item you feel the nausea in your stomach. You quickly put it in your pocket and try to think of something else. ‘What is this strange place where people ‘come out’ of Boxes and night never comes?’ you wonder. The music makes you lose focus and you are afraid. You are alone, tired, thirsty and hungry. ‘How can I be thinking of food at a time like this?’ you ask yourself out loud.

Everywhere you look, you see crowds of happy people smiling cheerfully. A few clowns juggle and walk on stilts, entertaining the public and, in the distance, you see a couple of vendors selling balloons and other Carnival trinkets. ‘No food, huh? And even if they had food, I have no money to buy it… Maybe, if…’ Your thoughts are interrupted by someone behind you, who keeps poking his finger into your shoulder. It is a clown, wielding a gigantic Mallet. He takes a swing and the bloodlust in his eyes makes you freeze in panic and close your eyes. As the Mallet hits your head, you hear a loud “Squeeek!”. The clown and the crowds around you start laughing. Embarrassed, you confiscate the strange Mallet and give the clown a mean look. It is just a party trick! You feel yourself blushing as the crowd laughs on.

The Mallet seems to be made out of Rubber-Wood. It is not heavy at all. As you hand him over the object, the funny looking clown raises his tiny hat in sign of appreciation and starts to hit himself with the Mallet. The crowd cannot get enough of him and, as he walks away, you start feeling better about not holding a grudge. All around you, balloons and smiling faces greet your surprised face. Everywhere you look, you see the Carnival. The music seems to enchant everyone around you. They all smile and look like they are having a good time. Everything seems to be a dream, how the people move, their voices and even the way everything moves around you seems fantastic. It all seems unreal! ‘But it is real!’ you tell yourself.

Anywhere you look, you see the same smiling faces, you hear the same enchanting music, you smell the same food the vendors sell at their booths and you feel the same people bumping into you. This feels magic and strange in the same time. As your mind starts to slowly clear, you find yourself in a state similar to that of waking up from a trance. However, as you wake up, you now have the bizarre feeling the Carnival is taking you in another type of trance. Too many questions bump each other inside your mind, none to which you can find an answer. Dazed and confused, you cannot help but observe the euphoria all around you. All these people, the crowds, the clowns, the vendors, are strangers, just like you. Nobody seems to be from around here, wherever ‘here’ might be.

You feel exhausted and everything that happened has been too much for you. All the people start to look identical, like they are all wearing the same type of masks, and the music starts to become nauseating. Even so, you wander around the Carnival, not knowing what to find. Everyone is smiling and happy, they all look like puppets, slowly dancing to their master’s song… They do not seem to pause, to talk with each other, to express any feeling… ‘Is this a dream? Can all this be real? Why?’ you remember everything that happened the day before, the Wood Room, Marind, the little girl, the clown and his Mallet… Confused, you decide not to fall in this new trance. Instead you will act.

You feel your senses and your heart flood with emotions. You feel your mind burning, over-loaded by fatigue and too many unanswered questions. You now search for a place where you could distance yourself from the sights and sounds of the Carnival, a retreat. Nevertheless, everywhere you look, you just see more people… With each step you take, you sense you are getting closer to something. However, you do not know what that something might be. Between these clowns and crowded alleyways you know you will find a place of sanctuary. However, after walking for a very long while, you slowly begin to lose your faith.

You feel like you are the luckiest person ever, when through all those loud crowds you manage to find an isolated fountain, an empty place, where you feel nobody could disturb you. You hear some birds singing in the trees, the Carnival music slowly fading away. Here, even the Sun seems to shine in a different way. The fountain is made of cold Marble and just touching it makes you feel better. As you dip your hands in the fountain’s water, all your worries seem to drift away, slowly, farther and farther away. A state of calmness takes over you and, as your lips touch the water you feel awakened, at peace with yourself and everything around you. You sigh and gaze at the sky, happy and calm. Everything here seems to be flawless.

You feel time slowly drifting away, taken over by the calmness of Nature. Everywhere you look, Nature greets you with its beauty… The chilly water runs gently in the fountain and from time to time, you play with it. Everything is perfect here, you feel so good you never want to leave. However, your curiosity and your spirit of adventure take advantage of the situation… You hesitate hoping to enjoy the calmness a little while more. ‘It is now or never!’ you take a final look in the fountain’s clear water before starting to walk away. You leave the fountain behind and move on, trying to decide what to do next.

The first step is always the hardest. As you move away from the fountain, your being fills with excitement and you feel something inside of you slightly changing. You cannot tell if the change is good or bad, but as you carefully slip deeper inside the calmness of the trees, you start feeling better and better. Your feel like all your senses have just awakened from a deep slumber. The trees seem more alive and you feel safer between them. Through the peaceful trees, you start to think of your ancestors… Who they were, what they did, how great were some, how others were not… ‘The paths are dusty and old, maybe as old as these trees…’ Your heart beats faster as some birds start to chirp cheerfully and play.

You smile to yourself and to Nature, for its gifts are beautiful and due to these gifts and to Nature’s calmness, you have released yourself from the madness of that bizarre Carnival. Images flash through your head while you think. A little girl, a Wood Room, a crazy Carnival… they seem like dreams from a different time and age… All those things are now behind you and you are moving forward. From now on, you always will! You reach a set of beautiful Gates. They seem to act both as an exit and as an entrance. They look very old, but they are strong, for they withstood time’s vengeance. You pass the Gates and follow the path. Even if you do not know where it will lead you, you are not afraid. You choose your own fate from now on, of that you are sure!