With all due respect, and I appologise for the courseness of this example, black people consider the N word bad not because they believe black people are bad, latinos consider the S word bad not because they believe latinos are bad, this is exactly the same sort of derogatory word for gay people. Its a word that used to be used to slag gay people off, and therefore is not considered decent or respectful language in polite society, let alone with someone who you hardly know. Quite aside from the fact that saying "You give homosexuals a bad name" automatically implies you have a prejudice, there is absolutely no need to mention somebody's sexual preference whatsoever in commenting about their personality just as there is no need to mention someone's skin colour. I couldn't care less if you like to slag your mates off calling them stupid names and they arn't offended, that isn't the situation here.
It's a joke that this is even being discussed as potentially not being offensive. This isn't prime minister's question time, it isn't and now in the actor's studio, this isn't a topic about what is offensive and what isn't. Someone has had a homophobic remark placed on their PL and they are, quite rightly, not happy about it. If you don't have something constructive to say in order to resolve the situation then you are just exhaserbating an already unpleasant situation for the relevant person involved.
Z