Hey Mur, I'm trying to SELL these cure-all pickles, don't mess up my "snake-oil" sales pitch.
They not only solve the problem of viscosity, they are also good for bad breath, rudeness, brain farts, flat feet, poor eyesight, the heartbreak of psoriasis, noobism, crossed fingers, blue screen, planned obsolescence, death, taxes, body odor, poor memory, and empty pockets (mine).
They have been known to counteract the effects of over-indulgence, hubris, lack of sleep, too much sleep, excessive static cling (i.e. pet hair), and low vitamin deficiencies.
More people who have eaten spicy pickles have survived than not.
Everyone should try one! Or two!
(Yes, this is intended to be humorous. Also to point out that what I CLAIM to be, "ain't necessarily so". Caveat emptor.).